Friday, August 28, 2009
A long time ago i decided i wanted to be awesome. Easier said than done but for the most part i achieved entering the general realm of awesome. Thing is, over time i've become lazy, life's become stressful, and all i've worked for seems to be leaving me behind in the foreign place of post-awesomeness.. I don't like this place one bit. I think it's one of the few things in life i actually can't accept. Now at first it was just scary, confusing and annoying, but then the final stage set in. Those i had tried so hard to gain, still love me, but are no longer "wow"ed by me. Were did the wow factor go? I used to be admired for my delightful personality and whitty charm. Both seem to be leaving me. Now i could just accept it like i do everything else in life, but i can't. The one thing i had in life was at least i was happy with who i was, how people saw me, and how i affected the small world around me. I never had much effect, but i had some. So now i'm on a new mission. I am going to try my hardest to be awesome again, even if that means being less me. I'll still be quite unconventional, that's something i can't (and don't want to) change; but i'll be different. It's going to take a whole lot of time and energy, but it's worth it.. Here goes somethin!
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Lately i've been thinking about how it feels like a chapter in my life is ending. However i realized that while a chapter or two (maybe three?) have ended this summer it doesn't exactly feel that way. It feels like the entire book is coming to a close. Now i don't mean to say that i feel like my life is ending; quite the opposite actually. I feel like life is series of books, and this is the ending of the second (or third) book. It was only four years long but it was a quite interesting book. And there are many signs it's ending. People are leaving, saying their goodbyes, tying up loose ends, and going off to lead new lives. So now it's my turn to move on with my life, and i have no idea where it's headed. All the roads have turned into paths and i can wander as i please. But eventually i'll have to be careful not to miss the next road. However, i have not yet exactly started this journey. I'm still in the process of saying my goodbyes and tying up my loose ends. Thing is it's not so much the fact the book is ending that worries me; it's that it's been such an amazing book it really does deserve an amazing ending.. so lets just sit back and hope it does :)